Love has the power to break all chains!
True personal growth comes when you choose to honestly communicate and understand those you have conflict with even if it means living in tension and being accountable for each of your own actions. This is when discrimination and self serving categorization of others ends.
If you are of Christian persuasion, please remember, Christ did not come as more commandments on a stone tablet, rigid, cold and without feeling but, rather a warm, loving, and totally transparent being.
Three simple words , without knowing the context, have endless implications/applications. A simple accidental bump into someone, if you interrupt someone, a common courtesy, These type of apologies are typically immediate. The phrase is a polite gesture allowing us to coexist in a somewhat civil society. Making amends can also vary culturally. For example, in Japan the word for sorry is “gomen”. If you are at fault in a car accident, even before judgement and damages are awarded, you are culturally expected to offer what is referred to as “gomen money”. Those familiar with the Far East understand that “saving face”, a karma centered ideology, yields a population of humility and tolerance. I admire the Japanese tact that it in a sense, requires a time of reflection as well as setting the stage for the more western ideology of forgiveness. 
Humility and forgiveness go hand in hand I have often wondered if it is possible to forgive without an apology. Additionally, must you forgive when an apology is given. For me I believe the answer is simple. If the apology is sincere, it makes it easy to forgive.
However, If insincerity is present does the apology mean anything? I remember when I was around 10, being full of myself, sharing with my Dad Tony, how someone had wronged me and the next day she had apologized to me. I smugly shared, “I told her I didn’t accept her apology”. He immediately scolded me and made it clear that if someone makes the effort to apologize, you damn well better accept it. Looking back, my not wanting to accept the apology was a lapse in judgment in the form of wanting to hurt, those that hurt me. The apology and her taking ownership was the key to breaking the cycle of vengeance and arrogance. We are human, as the Bible says in Matthew 5 23:25, if you come to the altar with a gift but have conflict in your heart with your brother, leave immediately and go to your accuser so that you may resolve the conflict, and then once again return to the altar with a clear heart.
If an apology never comes? That’s where forgiveness in order for you to move forward is so crucial.
Peace to you.
I learned that you are dead.
Although words say you have passed, your cruel deeds committed by you to me as a child still lingered for decades.
You might have softened and treated your own children better than you treated your foster children.
I had a condition you judged as a plea for attention. Rather than love and understanding you provided physical and verbal abuse.
Perhaps you learned cruelty from those that mistreated you. I have pity for you or anyone in that circumstance if that was the case.
Perhaps you thought you taught discipline and tough love. You were mistaken.
I learned from you how it was to feel neglected and mistreated.
Because others that showed me what unconditional Love was, I was given the gift of learning that not all in the world were evil and cruel.
With this gift I have strived to the best of my ability to choose Love.
Love has the power to break all chains, yes, even the chains that until this point attempted to bind me, even from the grave.
Dedicated to all child victims and survivors of abuse, neglect, and those many many upstanding Foster Parents that instill Love and understanding to those in need. God Bless You.
“God Bless my first wife”my second wife of almost 20 years often thanks god for her “breaking me in”. Broken in or not, one thing if we are being honest, most married couples/couples can attest to is, people say Stupid S#%t.
In the 1999 Comedy science fiction movie Galaxy Quest, what looked like a not-so-happy ending for the heroic crew was reversed by the “Omega 13 “, a super-charged time travel device which turns back time, you guessed it, for 13 seconds. Who knew that a prop from a Star Trek spoof would be key to improving a relationship.
The “Omega 13” Copyright by Dreamworks LLC.The Secret of the Omega 13
When you activate the Omega 13 or what we refer to as “15 Seconds”
When one says “15 Seconds!”,
1. What was said in the last 15 Seconds is immediately drawn into a black hole located ~6 degrees of off The North Star.
2. You are immediately admitting you messed up
3. It allows you a second GO by rephrasing, or simply shutting up and hugging the other person.(Wearing a protective cup may be advised if you choose the hugging approach and your initial blurt was incite-ful vs.”Insightful”)
4. You break the tension in the moment because you start thinking of that ridiculous movie and still are amazed that this crazy tool works.
5. It allows the other person to show mercy.
6. It allows you to laugh
I think the real reason “15 seconds” works is because we both are committed to it working. It’s a sign that when you are both spent and really don’t fell like butting heads, you are both willing to (queue Cher, try not to think of that song) turn back time, and find your way, Together. Peace.
Friday Fictioneers is a weekly photo-prompted 100 word writing challenge. Based on a photo prompt, the challenge is to pen a work of 100 words or less.
PHOTO PROMPT © Rochelle Wisoff-Fields
Word count 50
Let Your Heart Shine
Our hearts, just as the clouds, are shaped by warmth, shadow and darkness.
A passionate sun, blinding our inner soul with infatuation
Ill-prepared for the coming storm that if endured, tempers ones spirit with wisdom, understanding, and compassion producing a burning ember that is Love.
If you’re interested in joining, or would like to read Rochelle Wisoff-Fields’ blog; https://rochellewisoff.com/2017/03/01/3-march-2017/
Visited my Dad Gerald last night in a dream. Perhaps it was brought on after watching “Walk the Line”. Dad admired Johnny Cash. Perhaps for his out reach to prisoners but I am sure for some of his wry lyrics in songs like
I Got Stripes
“On a Monday,
My momma come to see me
On a Tuesday,
They caught me with a file
On a Wednesday,
I’m down in solitary
On a Thursday,
I start on bread and water for a while”
Or
Sunday Morning Coming Down
“The beer I had for breakfast, wasn’t bad so I had one more for dessert”
Based on Dad stories it sounded like Johnny was singing his life story.
In my dream, Dad was incarcerated and I sat with him and fellow inmates in a common area, almost like a barracks environment. What was different was that we were able to take a walk outside.
The sun was shining on a gorgeous day. I put my arm across his shoulders, the sun had warmed his back and I could feel his loving spirit. We ventured up a hill where many logs had fallen.,He picked up a giant one and placed it to keep a cliff side from collapsing. We had a few laughs, shed tears of joy for just being together but also shed familiar tears that I remember so many times growing up when it was “time to go”. Regardless, it filled my soul. Peace.
RIP GJR
First I would like to speak of two alternative candidates. (We were made to “fear” the uncertainty they brought)
Two “alternatives ” Johnson and Bernie
I realize I’m an oversimplifying.
Bernie chose to jump on the Democratic wagon. I imagine with his age, he may have thought that this was his only chance. I think he would’ve done well running as an independent. I truly believe he would have broken through.
Johnson on the other hand, didn’t want to participate war games and nation building with policies such as the Bush doctrine OR potentially get lost in the lemming herd of the GOP nominees.
Bernie is on the bench now and I have to think he realizes allot of power lies with Congress. I like to think he feels he can still make a difference as he has his whole political career. Him being president was never about ego, it was about heart.
As one respectful commentor (thank you) has pointed out to me recently, Gary simply may not have the will or the means to take it as far as he possibly could have.
Two major “players”
Historically When minorities were ignored (by either party) they, like Johnson, may not have had the will or the more importantly the means to be heard.
GOP
When the mostly white middle class started tasting what minorities had suffered under for so many years, they found of voice that spewed their anger(I refuse to use his name). A moral compass is the least of their concern.
Basic Needs
May I suggest that, to better understand what is happening here, we look to Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. Let’s assume that people’s basic needs of food and shelter are being met. Next up is safety. Before we move up the pyramid toward love self-esteem and self actualization we need to feel safe.
Is there any doubt now why fear has become the centerpiece of the political platform for each of the two major parties?
This post is not something to provoke another bashing of “what’s wrong with the party” you don’t support. This is a post to take challenge all of us to take a hard look at yourself as you did in psych 101.
How possibly can we feel like we belong or feel loved if we are being fed endless portions of fear and uncertainty? Let us not forget The Lesser of two evil still provide you a healthy dose of fear which metabolizes in one’s soul feeling unsafe.
“The only thing we have to fear is fear itself”-FDR
May peace be with you all.
14 years old
Your arm was around me
You were my hero
I noticed the strength in your arm
I felt safe and loved
The veins in your arm were pronounced, bulging, appearing to be at capacity of their designed function. I commented that your strength was that of a body builder.
You responded that they were like that from a treatment to keep them from collapsing from your days of drug abuse.
My thoughts shifted from admiration of your physical strength to your honesty, humility and intent to have your son not repeat the mistakes that held you captive so many years ago.
“Forgive others and you will be forgiven” ,”Forgive and forget”.
In Luke 23:34 Jesus said “Father forgive them for they know not what they do”.
All familiar phrases. We love to provide this advice to others.
Others that we might not have any idea what they have experienced.
Then, as he only can, C.S. Lewis hits you between the eyes with, “Everyone thinks forgiveness is a lovely idea… Until he has something to forgive.”
Recently myself and loved ones experienced deep emotional wounds caused by those who we had thought to be trustworthy friends, almost like family. As merciful time has provided some healing of these wounds, a mental inventory tends to naturally take place and much like hitting the refresh button for a website, an evaluation takes place on the status of personal relationships. Personally as I described in an earlier post, “Human Nature”, A simple approach to the worthiness of a personal relationship can be evaluated by what others do while you are at your most vulnerable.if they cut your jugular, this is a reflection of their character and more importantly, NOT YOURS. At that point it’s not about forgiveness, all that matters is having enough self respect to sever ties to that person. Although it may sound harsh, to engage with them is to engage with a fool or a drunkard.
Training Day 1 (T-1) of Marine Corps bootcamp many years ago, we were told. “Look at each other and let’s make something clear!” “There is no black, white, yellow, brown, or red!” “There is only green!”Some may be dark green or light green but you are all green and equally worthless!” It was the removal of looking at each other as a different color in “stressful” circumstances that empowered us to succeed as one. Brothers forever. Amen #semperfi #alwaysfaithful
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